JUMPSTART YOUR 2014 BY DOING THE “INNER WORK”
Great article this week from this couple on Oprah’s Own Network. .
A recurring theme that came up with clients this week, especially younger women still finding their path was: “staying put” or breaking away from a relationship to start on their own. This is something many couples that come to me for healing are experiencing these days (whether they are in their 20s or older with families newly divorced) with the new changes surfacing from December’s solstice - its imperative to raise the bar for yourself and in order to do this - you must first do the “inner work”.
With the divine feminine that was talked about at Return of the Ancestors, we are still going thru this shedding process of forgiving and healing thousands of years of pain in the last cycle from the unbalance between men and women. This goes beyond partners, to shedding and healing the pain from men given to our grandmothers, mothers and ancestors and all the females of our time and lineage around the world that need to be “cleansed and healed by ALL OF US.
As this new energy emerges, it is leading us EVEN FURTHER into this new birth cycle of humanity lead by the divine feminine that will continue our growth and expansion.
As women, this also includes closure and healing with all male figures that may have hurt us who may have not been the best role models at times the last 25,000 years. Conscious or otherwise - we all connect to this energy and this grieving/shedding process that started with our work at Return of the Ancestors in 2009 continues.
Whether its healing with a father, brother or a spouse, etc. these wounds must be healed (in both men and women) as the burdens of carrying around old layers of pain/trauma from lifetimes no longer serve us where we are going.
Like the video above, men and women staying in a relationship that doesn’t meet their needs or trying to hard to find a replacement thru dating someone they need to fix, rescue or heal doesn’t cut it in the NOW. Whether your stay/living in an existing relationship or decide to move out for a while, either way - you must first self examine, spend time alone in reflection and do the “inner” work on yourself in order to make things better.
TIME FOR CLARITY AND PERSPECTIVE AND SELF LOVE IS THE KEY...
What is doing the “inner work” ?
Depending on one’s level of growth - some people don’t understand what this term means.
Doing the “inner work” is different for each individual but its taking the time to “DO” you. Its working on yourself, physically emotionally and spiritually to heal and know yourself better inside and out. Its reflecting and shedding pain/hurt/anger that surfaces by spending time with you, its going for a healing, its creating/doing things you love doing, going in nature, doing yoga and connecting spiritually with groups of friends (and alone) to access the answers and insight you seek from within. Its also forgiving those you have hurt or who may have hurt you and truly releasing that pain from holding you back. All of these things are therapeutic examples to better understand you and what needs to be worked on at this time.
Those who say they don’t need healing.. are usually people that need it the most with the biggest egos - as we are all here on this earth to work on ourselves.. including whoever you go to for a healing!
Clients actively dating before a relationship is dissolved to avoid being alone or to avoid doing the self-love/inner work during these times is disasterous. Maybe in the past few decades this band-aid worked for a brief period of time, but where we are now in the process of expansion, things are way too transparent for this to work any longer.
There are also those who sometimes want to “rescue” their partners or who just cant be alone. Or others who use finances as the excuse to spend years cohabitating under one roof living separate lives - when all they have to do is do the “inner” work.
Remaining stuck in an unhappy situation or blaming the other person is not the solution.
Its working on healing and loving yourself through this “inner work” to let the answers you seek “come to you” through self love. This in turn, will allow one to derive at the “right decision” on whether to stay or live alone... and no choice is a wrong choice..
whatever path one is lead to follow personally or professionally - leads to expansion and better understanding of the self on your own journey. Then the right new beginning can emerge.
When we “try too hard” to open new doors personally or professionally..or grow impatient with the process of “inner work” one may feel “defeated” when it doesnt happen soon enough.. because we are not trusting creator and the nature flow of the process. Everything you want and need arrives on time when its supposed to happen.. TRUST that!
Looking for a partner without doing this “inner” work first will vibrationally attract exactly where you are in the NOW - and that impatience may delay your growth or may quickly show you what you don’t want or what needs healing/fixing in yourself to have what you do want.
For example, if your “needy and insecure,” you will attract someone “needy and insecure.” Or if you feel wronged or unloved by a partner with healing needed., you will attract someone new who mirrors your feeling of being “unloved” “wronged” or abandoned” by a partner. If you care more about appearances than love, than you will attract someone like you - more about material goods and appearances than “real” love.. The list goes on and on....as relationships serve as mirrors.
Or maybe your happily married - but still feel you and your spouse are growing/expanding at different levels during these time... or you may question if you are growing in the same direction? Does that mean “abandon ship?” Not necessarily... by doing this inner work, it will guarantee a happier better version of you - leading to a myriad of choices.. all good! because you will be trusting yourself, trusting creator and therefore trusting your own choices as they present themselves...and on an “unconscious” level - many men and women I see for healing “second-guess” their choices or actions at times.. Do the “inner work” and this wont happen! you’ll have greater confidence in who you are and the choices you make and your partner will have a better understanding of them as well - often bringing a deeper level of understanding as a couple or family through the individual healing process.
The scenarios Ive seen with clients leading up to last two weeks all have the “reoccuring” theme of people shedding these layers of “uncertainty” and embracing the changes.. both alone (through self-love) as well as together. There are many different stories and blueprints -yet all lead to a “breakthrough” of the self.
Since we are all in a transitionary state adjusting to this new energy - now is the time to work on your spiritual self.
For those who are asking the questions in their present relationships, I urge you during this time to not “throw the baby out with the bathwater” so to speak... and really do the self love before making any rash decisions. As you can change your home, change your furniture, change your spouse, etc.. but at the end of the day.. its still you in the mirror and your core issues that need healing.
As I have shared many times, my own personal challenges in my 30s found me drawing people who needed rescuing/healing on some level, because on an unconscious level, that is what I was putting out - “that i needed rescuing.” That was part of my growth as a healer and on an unconscious level, those I dated were like “moths to the flame” - they couldn’t help but feel better with someone who could heal and understand them - yet who also needed rescuing.
As I approached my forties, like many men and women who I encounter working on themselves, those layers of needing to heal others were reserved for my clients and for those friends and loved ones I had permission to heal - as healing oneself is a personal journey - and as a healer, I always ask for permission before healing anyone in my life!
Male clients and friends these days are also taking ownership of healing themselves “on their own,” just like the woman are doing and its beautiful to see! The key is not to try so hard, as the right form of healing (reiki, energy, yoga, traditional therapy, the right book, the right healing modality, etc) comes to a person when they don’t look so hard to find it! - as everyone is on a different level of understanding. Trust your own guidance on this! if it doesn’t ressonate - its not for you- even if the friendly clerk at your book store says its a “best seller” - read and find what books fly off the shelf and personally call you!
Like my female clients, my male clients are not looking to be rescued, and because they understand self-love and how important it is to heal oneself, they understand/practice self love too by making time for energy healing and other healthy/spiritual pursuits.
Men, just like the women are all related to us as sons, grandsons, brothers, uncles and ex husbands - and therefore, they understand with unconditional love and compassion the healing that needs to be done inside with the divine feminine energy emerging - shedding and healing years of women not being treated right.. It is this sensitivity in ALL OF US connected to the divine feminine that is healing/connecting both men and women to find more love and compassion for one another. The lessons and growing pains are difficult at times, but I promise you, its leading humanity to a better place!
Also important during this time is being comfortable being alone. Being social at times is great, but everyone needs their down time and quiet solitude time alone. Very important for everyone in this lifetime. As we are born alone, we die alone and many face being alone through divorce or death at some point in life. If one is not comfortable with their own company “being alone” - that too is a lack of “self love.”
and yes, it can “push” someone out of their comfort zone to do new things and meet new people, but it is the best form of self-discovery one can make to truly know oneself.
When people work on themselves and trust their own connection with the divine, regardless of their personal relationship situation, there is only a peaceful sense of trust and the right things vibrationally flow naturally. It is the law of the universe.
Finding or grasping for love on a biological time clock or looking at what others do or have compared to you and your own “movie” will get you nowhere and letting envy or jealousy fester inside - will leave you feeling deflated and disappointed “chasing” someone else’s dream or vision - especially since its not your path. as You are YOU! and YOUR unique!
This self love means respecting yourself enough to say “no” to family, peer pressure, partners or potential suitors who don’t respect your needs or your boundaries. When you do “YOU” and you do the inner work - you not only feel happier - but you will naturally repel or stay away from those who don’t match your vibrational level. As a result, others - whether it be a spouse, friends or family member, etc.. will fade away unless they can do the “inner work” and rise to your vibrational level.
As we move into receiving more and more of the divine feminine energy - the choices of women coming into their own and finding their “voice” is surfacing and will continue to lead and help nurture the men with these changes.
This new energy is not only allowing our divine feminine side emerging as women to shine, but it is also teaching the men how we want to be treated as they too “feel the unconditional love” as spouses, fathers, uncles, brothers, sons and grandsons - healing/shedding the pain of the female over many lifetimes.
As we “jumpstart” this new year may you too, find the clarity to shed any emotional layers that no longer serve you. Whether they be emotional or physical layers or some other type of pain/trauma from the past that no longer serves you on this leg of your journey.
Like my good friend Cal Garrison talks about on Worldviewz:
It is the cosmic opening that started on the winter solstice (December 21st) to tomorrow’s Epiphany (El Dia de los Reyes - “The Day of the Kings” ) across the world that we are still adjusting to with so many of these new energies being brought to us the last two weeks - there is still so much to process. We are just scratching the surface of really realizing who we are and where we want to go as we experience more changes.
As the layers are shed and the “REAL “ you springs forth, it is important to trust and allow the process to unfold naturally. No pieces should be rushed or “made” to happen instantly - whether it be a new mate, a new job or working on a continued goal or dream.
Day dream, play, get creative, make time to go in nature and follow naturally what you have a spark to work on each and every day including YOU. The importance is to continue receiving the flow of new energies as they unfold. With the New Year, it is also the perfect time to “jumpstart” your new year and weed out those physical and emotional layers that need to be cleansed and healed on your journey with energy healing. Do the “inner work” and you wont be disappointed in yourself or your choices.
Exit 27 Transformational Healing (www.exit27healing.com) will be offering
a special discounted student rate of 20% off the entire month of January to help you start the year off in a whole new way!
Have a Happy and Healthy New Year!
With Love and Light,